Do you feel the need to eliminate hatred and fill up this world with love? If yes, you are at the right place. Here, I am reflecting upon the possibilities of creating a loving world. Read on…
Today, we are living in a not so loving world. Hatred is brewing in every social circle in real as well as in virtual (digital) world. The worst part is that the level of hatred is rising at a blazing speed.
We are caught up in a constant battle of This vs. That. It is dividing the entire human community. The concepts of unity and solidarity are eroding out fast.
Amidst the turmoil, I get a glimpse of a loving world when I interact with elderly people. They always welcome us with open arms and a sweet smile. Their warmth does not dim out even while tackling multiple health issues. I believe this planet is still habitable because elderly family members are showering unconditional love upon us.
Nobody else but the matured adults give me the hope and inspiration to build an invisible nest where people of all age groups feel safe and sound. My perspective of creating a loving world and restoring oneness includes the following steps:
Stop judging others.
This is the first major step towards creating a loving world. Observe people and study their behavior but do not judge them. It is a shoddy social behavior. If I do not judge someone, that person gets the freedom to project his or her authentic self.
What happens when you judge me? I feel intimidated. It is a natural human reaction. This fear triggers a whirlwind of negative emotions. It affects our mutual understanding. A sweet relationship turns sour in no time. Henceforth, I presume everyone is going to judge me in the same manner and resentment grows against every single person in the surroundings.
Break the habit of fault-finding.
This obsession to magnify flaws in others creates a toxic environment. It becomes a breeding ground for ill feelings. The critic in me may feel superior for a few seconds, but it ruins a friendly equation in the long run.
No harsh remarks on social media.
Passing a harsh comment on social media platform (even if it is made in jest) is a trend which shows my mental rigidity. I have my self-imposed standards. Anyone who deviates from this standard is bad in my eyes. The inflexible Me, the target recipient, and numerous social media users get engaged into ugly slugfest on flimsy grounds. In this way, we end up blocking the scope of a harmonious interaction.
Watch your words during tough conversations.
Saying mean things to others or pulling someone down to boost ego is an obvious sign of dominating behavior. Pause for a moment before lashing out unkind words on someone out of arrogance. Try and use simple words (no cuss words) with a positive tone (not offensive tone) to explain the challenging situation.
Less argument and more discussion.
Discontentment flares up when we are desperate to prove my point of view is better than yours. In a healthy discussion, we can see that both the opinions are valuable. There is no need to push away one opinion to impose another opinion. Your opinion and my opinion can coexist.
Highlight the goodness in others.
When we say something good about someone, the atmosphere fills up with love and affection. It is so contagious that it touches many other lives in the vicinity. Express appreciation, verbal praises to unveil the best qualities in them. It shifts focus from hatred and hopelessness to peace, love, and delight.
Give some breathing space to all.
Man is a social animal. We need regular social interactions for survival. Quite often, we tend to forget our limits and intrude into other people’s personal space. This is a common occurrence while mingling with teens and young adults in particular. We end up giving them instructions which they never asked for.
They have the freedom to live life in their own terms. An unintimidating behavior on our part here is to ensure there is no communication barrier. If unresolved issues crop up, they are free to call for help. We are available to protect the cub with tender loving care.
Practice active listening.
In the era of information overload, everyone is eager to talk and get an instant validation during online as well as offline communication. It is rare to find a good listener. Be that reliable, patient listener who believe in a slow-paced conversation without much noise. The speaker gets a safe space to vent out pain, frustration, confusion, et all. The stress level goes down, and a beautiful bond of love gain prominence.
Love Your Life.
We dislike our life when we are immersed in too many regrets and complaints. The underlying cause of self-pity is unfulfilled desires. I expected a certain kind of life, but it went to an altogether direction.
Instead of dwelling on woes and relying on outcome-based happiness, learn to absorb the knowledge/experience as it comes. A deeper sense of fulfilment blossoms and you are in a better position to embrace people with full heart under all circumstances.
Avoid self-criticism.
When we fail in an endeavor, the first thought that crosses our mind is “I am a worthless fellow”. Is it? No, I just need to remind myself that I used a wrong technique. I may need some time to understand the right technique, but I have the confidence to find it sooner or later. This coping skill helps me to extend support and encourage other people who are dealing with their personal failures.
Worry Less and Trust More.
We destroy many of our plans by worrying about things which will never happen. The intention to create a small, loving world for our near and dear ones is challenging. Some basic changes required at personal level which will not going to happen overnight. Similarly, changing age-old perspectives at community level will not show any immediate results.
However, we must remain proactive and trust the process. We need to invest extra time and stay committed. Many of our efforts may fail. Again, a few of them will yield unexpected, good results. We shall never get disheartened by the failures. Never stop learning. We shall count on our blessings and march ahead because the world deserves more love and care from us.
WRAP UP NOTE: An honest endeavor of creating a lovey-dovey world with these baby steps will cost nothing. However, these are big moves to reduce human conflicts at micro level. Be prepared to put in that extra effort together. Come on, we can do it!